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"I fancy women, girls, ladies, birds, not the feathered variety though,I'm not that weird. I have never fancied men, and cannot think of anyreason why a man, or a woman for that matter would want to fancy a man.Men are ugly and hairy and brutal. They are a funny shape with thingshanging out in awkward places. They are ungainly and hard, rough,they're just... well, men I suppose. Women, on the other hand, areattractive and soft and kind and graceful and caring. They always lookgood, always want to look good, look pretty in jeans, look pretty in askirt or dress, look pretty when they are wearing just a towel, lookcute with their hair in rollers, ..."I realised what I was saying, and where this was going, so stoppedabruptly. I very much doubt it would be possible for my cheeks to burnany redder than they did just then. I fumbled a cigarette out of thepacket, and tried to light the wrong end. Mitch smiled, took thecigarette off me and put it back in the packet. She took my hands. "Ha!" said Liz mischievously, "the other woman in Richard's life."Sharon was completely unfazed. "No," she said. "Just another woman. Deborah is the woman in his life."Liz smiled. "I think I'm going to like you," she said."You better had," murmured Richard, "or you'll be in dead trouble with Deborah as well as me." Sharon, love, can you give me a hand with the parasols?" asked Sue.Sharon nodded and went off with her."Not going to be a problem, brother-in-law elect," said Liz. "Everyone else loves her too by the look of it."Richard's parents, Edward and Harriet also arrived early, but only just. "The Labs went AWOL at the crucial moment," Edward explained. "Otherwise we'd have been here a bit earlier to lend a hand."Richard smiled and winked at Deborah. The Labradors never went AWOL. They always walked at heel.The locals made up the bulk of the first guest arrivals. Having been greeted by Deborah and Richard they were seized by the Jays who knew them all from their days at the pub..
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